Post-separation abuse is a continuation of power and control tactics used by a perpetrator after a relationship has ended, often designed to punish or intimidate the survivor.
Post-seperation abuse may include:
- Threatening or manipulating child contact
- Withholding financial support
- Spreading false allegations or misinformation
- Persistent texting, calling or stalking
- Making false reports to social services or authorities
- Undermining your parenting or turning children against you
- Refusing to comply with court orders
Unlike other forms of abuse, post-separation abuse can intensify once the survivor tries to regain independence. Leaving does not always mean the abuse stops: in fact, it can mark the beginning of a new phase of control.
Perpetrators may use children, finances and the legal system as tools to maintain dominance. This form of abuse can be especially difficult to prove, often appearing ‘reasonable’ on the surface while causing deep harm behind closed doors.
The emotional toll of post-separation abuse can be devastating, leading to anxiety, depression and exhaustion. Survivors may feel trapped in ongoing conflict, even years after the relationship has ended.
If you think you or someone you know may be experiencing post-separation abuse, please know that support is available. You are not alone, and it is not your fault.
Need support?
Solace provides expert support for women and children affected by domestic abuse in London, including counselling, advocacy, and safe housing.
