We understand how frightening it can feel if you think a friend may be experiencing domestic abuse. You want to support them, but it’s important to do so in a way that keeps both you and your friend as safe as possible.
Here are some ways you can approach and support them:
Check in privately
Find a safe, private moment to ask how they are. Try to choose an environment where they feel comfortable and there is no risk of being overheard.
Listen without judgment
If they choose to open up, listen carefully. Believe them, don’t interrupt, and avoid questioning their choices.
Prioritise safety
Do not confront the abuser. This could increase the risk for both you and your friend.
Encourage professional support gently
Let your friend know that support is available and that they are not alone. You can signpost to services such as Solace but avoid pressuring them: they will reach out when they feel ready.
Offer practical help
If it is safe and they are open to it, offer support such as a safe place to stay, help with transport, or keeping important belongings secure.
Stay connected
Experiencing abuse can be incredibly isolating. Regular check-ins, even a simple text, can help your friend feel supported and less alone.
Support safety planning
If they are open to it, you can help them think about a safety plan. This might include identifying safe contacts, code words, or steps to take in an emergency.
Keep connected
Being a survivor of domestic abuse can be an incredibly isolating experience. Maintaining regular, open lines of communication is essential so the survivor knows they are supported, valued, and not facing their situation alone.
Make sure to look after yourself too. Supporting someone through this can be emotionally heavy. Make sure you seek support for yourself if you need it.
Need support?
Solace provides expert support for women and children affected by domestic abuse in London, including counselling, advocacy, and safe housing.
