Emily’s story

“The football results gave me a gauge of how he would treat me later on. I knew that Sundays in particular, or sometimes Saturdays, depending on the day that his team were playing, were something that would shape the course of the evening or the whole weekend. I had such a sense of dread building up to the game. 
 
“If his team lost, I knew on the journey home that things were going to get darker. I can remember the anger. He would throw things and kick things a lot all the time. That fear of violence was always there and I was highly distressed. I was scared. 
 
“I’d always want his team to win because I knew he’d be nicer to me. He’d be in a better mood if his team won but he’d still drink heavily either way, so no matter the result, there was always that risk of the abuse escalating.  
 
“During the game I just felt like I couldn’t breathe properly. I had such awful tension in my body, particularly during a high-stakes game. It made me so nervous. I was always so genuinely fearful.” 
 
“Football essentially gave him a socially acceptable way of expressing his anger. His reactions were not proportionate in any way, and football facilitated that aggression.  
 
“It is a very male-dominated sport and there seems to be something about football stadiums in particular. There are these awful chants at the stadium, and I can’t think of another context where you might hear the same sort of misogynistic, threatening language as you do there, especially on that large of a scale.